I'll miss it.

I'm going to warn you right now. This post is going to be random, rant-y, and probably very un-followable. Clearly, based on the adjectives I've already used, it's not going to be very well-written either.

The second semester of my Junior year started yesterday. I am more than 5/8 of the way done with high school. That's fabulous and awful all at the same time. Let's start with why it's fabulous, because then I can rant about everything I hate, and then move on to what I love, so we can end this thought with the positive, and my motto (which is normally most prevalent when I'm eating...) is "save the best for last", so onward.

Fabulous. It will be fabulous to be done with all of this stupid busywork that consumes my life. You may know this as homework. No matter what I'm doing, there's always this constant nagging voice (which, not-so coincidentally sound a lot like my mother's) in the back of my head that repeats, "What could you be doing right now? Don't you have some homework you should be doing? Shouldn't you be researching colleges? Are you going to apply for a job or internship this summer? YOU SHOULD GET ON ALL OF THAT RIGHT THIS VERY INSTANT." It's exhausting to think about, really. I guess I just explained some of my other reasons for wanting high school to be over, but basically I have absolutely zero idea where I want to go to college, or what I want to do there. I'm hoping that by the time I graduate, I'll have figured that out. If not, then I've got bigger issues, and should probably invest in a visit to the psychologist. I could go on forever, but if you're reading this, you are probably a high schooler dealing with all of the same crap I am, so you probably don't want to be reminded of any of this.

So lets go on to the best part that we were saving for last.

So many things I'm going to miss when I'm gone. I'll miss actually having fun, random plans on the weekends, like this weekend for example. Thursday is Bluewater's "Les Miz." Friday is Heartweek decorating and THE IMPROV SHOW (so pumped!). Saturday is Drumline girls' sis sesh. All of it is such random, unrelated stuff, but I can say even hanging around the school on a Friday night for four hours to put up decorations sounds like fun. I have NO idea why, and it probably shouldn't, but it just feels like I'm part of something. I'm going to miss the play's and all of the insane and spectacular traditions that go along with them. Not to mention just the backstage atmosphere in general. It's just something you can't get anywhere but in the dark behind some curtains listening to a love song being played in the distance.

Ok, that unintentionally sounded like some kind of scene from a really dirty romantic movie. Sorry.

One thing that I'll miss the most is band. Prepare to read the nerdiest paragraph I will ever write.

I'll miss going to the band room before school when I have nowhere else to go, because I know there will always be someone to talk to there. I'll miss waiting there for a couple minutes after the bell rings at the end of the day just to say a quick "hi" to all of my friends that breeze in to get their instruments. I'll miss the feeling I get when the bell rings at the end of third block because I know my day is basically over. I'll miss feeling like I'm home whenever I walk through those heave double-doors. I'll miss the people most of all, because they're what make that room home.

Alright, sappy, nerd-paragraph over.

I honestly have no idea when I'll post again, and have feeling it won't be with any consistency. Sorry, but I have a total of seriously over 50 pages to read and take notes on. FML.

One thing that I am going to try to be consistent with is including a kind of "every-day source of happiness" in every post from now on. That sounds confusing, but it's basically just something little that got me through the day.

Today's little thing is getting a letter from a friend in the mail (thanks, Ellie <3)

Until next post.